obligatory gatsby post

Obsession of the last week or so: Jay-Z and co. on the new Great Gatsby soundtrack. Florence & the Machine, Lana Del Ray, Jack White, and will.i.am make appearances too, but the greatest part is actually how some of the songs manage to incorporate 20s-era jazz into modern hip-hop. This absolutely got me through finals, and I'm sure it'll be on repeat all summer.

personal pitfalls

A little more than a month ago, a girl I go to school with wrote this amazing op-ed for the YDN. It's all about what she calls "personal pitfalls," tiny little baby mistakes we all make in our daily lives that we just can't seem to avoid. They're "nickel-and-dime defects - punctuality, remembering birthdays, shower etiquette," she says (hers used to be using too many prepositional phrases and leaving hair on the wall of the shower), and maybe, if we acknowledged them, we'd get better at them. The op-ed ends with one of those calls to action that so many op-eds seem to end with; we should write down our personal pitfalls, keep an eye out, and fix them next time.

When I first read it, I think I was kind of scared of the idea of writing down all the little things I do that are irksome or annoying. I know my problems - and I know I have a lot of them - but writing them down would somehow make them more official or more true or more obvious. And, honestly, I figured there were too many to count. 

But, for some reason - maybe because it's break and I've got nothing better to do - I think I'm ready to start my list. And so, here are my own personal pitfalls: 

• I open too many tabs in Safari - sometimes when I'm writing papers, and mostly when I'm not.
• I still bite my nails, even though my dentist told me not to.
• On that note, I should be better about brushing/flossing/mouthwash.
• I use too many M dashes.
• I leave hair on the wall in the shower.
• I throw out food in the bathroom trashcans, even though Ian Hobbes has repeatedly told us to stop doing that.
• I drink too much Diet Coke when I'm home. Actually. Enough to fill a bathtub. 
• I still pick at my face, even though I'm always trying to stop.
• I hate socks.
• I'm bad at talking about my feelings.
• And at asking for help.
• And at admitting I'm wrong.
• Also, I hate doing laundry, and I'm bad at folding clothes.
• I use the word "also" too often.
• I'm pushy sometimes.
• Sometimes I do things just for the glory.

I don't mean any of these things in a self-depricating way; they don't make me feel worse about myself in that "oh-I'm-so-fat" kind of way. I think they're just facts, and that's fine. Maybe one day I'll fix some of them. Or maybe I'll keep adding to the list, and that'll be fine too. 

if i were a restaurant...

if i could be a restaurant, i'd genuinely just want to be ihop. i know, i know - it's not the fanciest restaurant (or even the most upscale chain) out there, and the options aren't particularly extensive, and it's probably never been rated by zagat, but it's still pretty great. and you know what? i like to think ihop and i have a lot in common, such as:

#1. really, we're all about comfort. let's be honest: sometimes, all you need is comfort food and a restaurant experience that loves you for you. i just walked into an ihop in the afternoon in sweatpants and a t-shit, ordered a giant stack of blueberry pancakes (with the ihop original butter pecan maple syrup), and no one judged me. everything about ihop says low-key comfort, from the cheesy (but homey) interior design to the picture menu to the awesome chocolate milk made from real hershey's syrup. it's like waking up on a sunday at grandma's house, safe and warm and happy.

#2. we're honest, and we like food the way it's supposed to be: delicious. ihop doesn't pretend to serve health-conscious, fancy cuisine. they serve honest-to-goodness pancakes. fluffy, buttery, golden brown pancakes. with lots of butter, and whipped cream if you want it, and a side of grease. no lies, no pretenses, just yum. 

#3. we believe that pancakes are best served... whenever you want them. ihop will serve me pancakes at 11pm. or 3pm. or 10am. why? because you can't schedule happiness, and ihop knows that. 

#4. we're not about to blow cash on something that could be overrated. you know when you walk into a restaurant, and see that they've got some forty-dollar sushi platter, and you're like, "hmmmm...." and then you order it and it's good but not worth forty dollars? yep, that'll never happen at ihop. ihop will serve you seven dollar pancakes, and they'll be worth every single penny. 

#5. sometimes, we like to be healthy. ihop offers options - if you're watching your waistline, you can get something on their simple and fit menu (which normally just means two pancakes instead of four, but hey!). sometimes, i like to convince myself i'm a healthy eater. when those days come around, i'd order off that simple and fit menu - no shame, because it's ihop - and eat to my skinny heart's content. 

so there you go. ihop. me. i like to think we're both low-maintenence, honest, thrifty, diverse, and delicious. are we both fattys? yes, yes we are. but millions of people like us just the way we are. 

to make: shorts and salads

i'm not very much of a maker - of food, art, crafts, or anything really - but last week, i made two things that actually turned out pretty well:

these shorts: 

(okay, not the entire pair of shorts, just the eyelet pocket)

and this salad:

 

both were super easy (given my lack of skills, anything more complicated than a double knot is just not going to happen). 

the shorts required nothing more than a pair of scissors, an extra strip of fabric (i used eyelet, but i'm sure anything you've got lying around would also be cute!), some pins, thread, and a needle. i've seen this done multiple ways, but i pinned before i cut, because i didn't want to end up with a patch that was much smaller than the actual pocket. all you have to do is take the fabric, tuck it in to the pocket of the shorts just a little bit (a quarter of an inch or less), and pin it at the top corners and bottom edge, then fold. then, sew the new fabric down to the top of the pocket, making sure not to go through the entire jean or else you've got a pocket you can't use, removing the pins as you go. once you've got the top part sewn on, continue along the sides and bottom of the pocket, following the outer seams of the pocket as seen on the inside of the shorts. once you're done sewing, snip the edges off as close as you can to the thread and voila! 

the salad, a favorite of mine since i first tried it at artopolis in the city last year, is even easier. just drop a half a cup of blue berries, a quarter cup of almonds, a quarter cup of crumbled feta, two cups of chopped lettuce (i used a mix of leafy greens and romaine), and one chopped chicken breast into a bowl and toss. add two tablespoons of raspberry vinaigrette and serve!  it's a fantastic summer salad - it's got tons of protein (given the almonds and the chicken), and is just sweet enough. the blueberries and feta are an unexpected combination that really works, and blueberries are one of my favorite summer foods, so it's definitely become a staple. 

of course, i'm always looking for similar recipes (and other cute diys). now that i've done these, maybe i can move on to replicating that asian chicken salad from the cheesecake factory or these american flag shorts. 

eh. baby steps. 

boot hunting

i'm in a love-hate relationship with pinterest. i mean, it's mostly love, because where else would i find all of my favorite no-bake recipes and clever art prints, but for the last week, it's also been lots of hate. see, the thing about pinterest, great as it is, is that it feeds all of these dreams of owning something perfect. 

case in point: the brown leather, size 7 (or 7 1/2), 2 to 3 inch heel riding boots i've been dreaming about for just a little too long. you know, the ones that are comfortable enough to walk around in, but still look fashion-forward? the ones that essentially complete every fall outfit, and are featured in almost all of those polyvlore pins with the cozy sweaters and warm fall scarves? yep. those are the ones i'm talking about. i know they exist (because they're on pinterest, so they have to exist), so why can't i find them? 

i don't know about you, but i'm apparently inept at finding the perfect pair of boots online - i've spent the last week scouring every shoe website i can think of, and still no luck! these? too expensive. these? sold out. these? don't come in my size. these? yes, when i win the lottery. i even went to all of the actual discount stores within a ten mile radius of my house yesterday (and that's actually quite a few), and still came up empty-handed (footed?). 

maybe i'm too picky, or maybe i'm looking in all the wrong places, but if you're out there, dream boots, please let me know. i'll buy you, and i promise i'll tuck my jeans in properly and accessorize well and tread lightly so i can keep you for decades. because they say love is hard to find, and you're proof that's true. 

street art

i've been meaning to upload this for a while - it's one of the most amazing pieces of street art i've ever seen, in london or anywhere else. how awesome is that? i'm sure paul, ringo, john and george would be proud. 

oh, and here's a few more - i haven't seen these, but maybe i'll hunt them down one day: 

more on pinterest 

silence.

i realized today that i'm afraid of silence. not in the monsters-under-the-bed, falling-to-your-death, man-eating-spiders kind of way, but still sort of scared, in that uncomfortable, claustrophobic, unsettling kind of way, where you just want it to be over as soon as possible. it's not that it makes me want to scream or gives me nightmares, it's just sort of chilling, and so i avoid it.

but today, i couldn't. i was walking through the park, from just below the met to west 66th street, by myself. i didn't have headphones for my iPod, and everyone i knew was either at work or traveling or probably just too busy to talk, so i had no one to call. so i was quiet.

and clearly, the city wasn't quiet - i mean, it's new york, so it's never quiet, but i was. and i'm never quiet. i smother the day in speech. maybe it's because i'm actually afraid of all the thoughts i never say. i guess if i'm talking, it means i won't have to listen, not even to myself. that sounds depressing. i'm not depressed. i think maybe i'm just a bad self-reflexive thinker. i'd rather talk about other things than be alone with my thoughts.

but ten minutes into the walk, i realized i wasn't actually the only person walking alone through the park - there was this woman out for a casual stroll, and all of the runners, of course, and even this guy, totally focused on playing his harmonica under a bridge for no reason other than to hear the music echo off the walls. and if all those people could sit alone with their thoughts, why can't i? 

okay, so maybe i'm afraid of silence. but, after i settled into it, it wasn't that bad of a walk. maybe - just maybe - that's a fear i can get over. now i just have to learn how to shut up every once in a while.